where am I ?

http://whykikiwhy.twitter.com

http://whykikiwhy.tumblr.com

http://whykikiwhy.blogspot.com


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life in point form.

- finally have decided on a second tattoo, that will be discreet (a.k.a only to be seen by lovers), sentimental, unique, and will make me seem much more romantic than I really am.

- have converted my friends into watching Maude episodes with me

- I got a whole bunch of slightly water damaged Western DVD's back from an unnamed international shipping company... my weekend is sorted.

- I'm sorting out my home and putting shit in shelves. It's look good.

- still sick, has gotten to the point where work has made me take a week off next week, where I will be poked and prodded more but without the cushion of medicare bulk billing, hopefully they will tell me that all the fuckery is cancer so I can just get microwaved for free already.

- yeah I'm the type of person who thinks cancer is lucky.

- selling all my life on eBay, I need the money and the space.

- everyone's birthday is this month or next so am looking for presents, one is almost sorted, the next will be soon, I hate being a fairweather friend

- I keep on dreaming about making duck confit, I think I might go and buy some duck fat (in a few years when I can afford it)

the last few months in point form

I turn 26 on on Wednesday.

Life is ok, new job is good i need to make sure I keep new secondment job,

Highlights of my life include sleep and watching illegally downloaded sketch shows from the early 90's

I'm having recurring dreams about people I have rooted from my past providing running commentary of my dreas and my sleeping habits.

I am trying my darndest to kick gluten

Flatmate moved out so am frickin broke beyond belief but I have space so much spce

As frickin broke will not be buying myself gift for my birthday ... aww

Oh shit I forgot to mail Christmas presents! um

I still dream about the day where I will buy my own kitchen aid with money I have saved and not used to pay for some other grown up person responsibility (water rates/ hot water tank/ electricity/ tetanus shots)

I still dream about going on a holiday where all I do is sleep and sleep and sleep

I have a twitter and it's updated much more frequently  https://twitter.com/why_kiki_why

I'm updating the other blog more often too it's much easier to write about clothes than the goings on of my vj

I'm going to bed... I'll soon officially be in my late twenties...sigh

Self portraits whilst bored at work

When I'm bored I draw self portraits, it's self indulgent wank but it keeps me occupied and reminds me that my life is just like a long never ending Cathy comic except I unlike Cathy don't say ack! and I actually posess a sense of humour.



Me in a Cardigan





Me as a robot


Me crying because I miss gluten

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Got Promoted

Nothing else to say, it's a better role slightly higher pay and government involvement,

I think I'm happy bout it.


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links; i have been wasting my time on

I have been super sick for the last week my insides have turned into jelly I cannot go anyhwere unless it's within ten feet of a toilet, doctors have just asked me to rest but it's been almost two weeks without pay and I'm getting mighty bored and scaredabout being more poverty stricken than ever before

 links that I found interesting.
weird meat: it's an interesting collection of a mans attempt to eat as many unusual mean products as he can, I've only gone so far as bull testicles but this makes me want to go a little crazier when my lower intestine decides to be co-operative

my parents were awesome; user submited photos of peopel parents before the kids came and sapped the lifeblood out of them, i love it as it's a reminder that everyone at some point has a phase being drunk and camwhoring.

post secret; I mean who doesn't read it, love it, I want to send something in but my secrets are probably a touch too contraversial

texts from last night; name really says it all same for Overheard in New York

eggs, eggs  and more eggs I am going to perefect the egg and all will come from lands far and wide to see my magnificent eggs

a great article; on catching a potential child molester from both the police and the criminal/victims point of view, and an interesting video about an individual dealing with paedophile urges,

in lighter non child molestation links;


when  smoke; usually when I'm drinking I usually gravitate toward menthol cigarettesno I know why, because they were made my magical flying penguins and I'm into whimsical mystical shit like that


.
why do I need to add commentary the video speaks on so many levels to all sorts of people.

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Oh and Indian Superman with his love interest Spidergirl

so

I've been well...ish well I had been I had managed to avoid gluten for over a month so was feeling on top of the world except last three days my digestive process has been much quicker and more liquidy than desired (even minus gluten) So off I went to the Doctor who immediately declared me to be pregnant, but I debunked that theory when I advised him that I had bled a few days ago, so he then declared me to have food poisoning or a virus which I agreed to and then he said I would be fine by tomorrow if I only ate eggs and rice and other bland foods which I did but I'm still churning away turning all that enters me into biley soupiness, but alls well that ends well I have spend my time productively watching

Community (the t.v series) ; which has to be the funniest thing I have seen in a very long time, dare I say funnier than 30Rock but not as funny as The Mary Tyler Moore Show my benchmark in Sitcom funniness, or M.A.S.H in the golden period of about a season that had both Colonel Potter and Frank Burns)

Delocated: (another T.V series); Adult Swim it's pretty damn funny

Mad Men Season Three; It's letting me down in so many ways, Don is a Douche, Betty is a Douche, Peggy is nowhere to be seen but I'm still watching because it's so pretty

Dexter Season Four; Good so far, but too much naked John Lithgow for my tastes, should read the books but y'know why bother when there is a T.V version

Born Yesterday;  A movie from 1950? I used to love this movie, the one liners, her accent! and this faboo sequinned jumpsuit she wears as loungesuit, it's a wonderful way to pass the day away.

another saturday at work

I swapped with someone to work on Saturday today

- good because is quiet at work and I have time to think, well sort of

- bad because the weather is so beautiful outside and I could be at the Good Food festival or some other Sydney gourmet wank gathering probably eating cheese and olives (my two favourite food groups)

- good because I’m now watching ‘Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas’ on my own personal TV whilst working

- bad as now I have no time to buy the final touch for my costume (hunting yellow lensed glasses)  I had planned to dress up as Walter (the John Goodman Character) from The Big Lebowski

- good as I don’t have to go to Halloween Parties I was invited by work/ half arsed friends to and make small talk to 21 year old girls dressed up as Lady Gaga whilst trying to explain the plot to The Big Lebowski and who I’m supposed to be, ok I got One good inviite might go to that one

- bad as now have nothing to do tonight halloweeny, theres a few good gigs on around town maybe can go out and see the Cuban Brothers or Bluejuice both great live shows

Overnight at 67c = perfection

I need a sous vide

It's an expensive temperature controlled water bath, I have been experimenting with trying to make 67 degree eggs (google them they are the most perfect eggs) and I can't get the water down below 73 degrees (two hours makes a closeish poor cousin copy) I'm absolutely jonesing for just clotted egg right now. Ooh and a two day cooked steak, maybe two ( I mean if i'm cooking steak for two dya I should make a backup one right?) and some asparagus spears for dipping.

I'm writing this where i'm on my way to leftover cauliflower broccoli and mustard soup which yes admittedly I did a great job on but when you want a two day cooked steak it ain't gonna cut it.

Damn why are sous vide so friggin expensive? I think I'm going to try and rig a slow cooker with a thermostat? I just need to figure out how to work with electricity which is really just a hit and miss kind of thing.

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what you should watch today

go to http://www.abc.net.au/iview

click on John Safran's Race Relations

then spend the next half hour wondering if you have a type, then the following hour wishing it was next week already.

I'm writing this on the bus on my new dang fangled iPhone thingy it's very disconcerting the whole touching a flat surface and having words appear instantaneously I'm never going to touch a flat surface again without expecting something to magically appear which will no doubt lead to lifetime of dissapointment.

I'm a little iPhone obsessed at the moment, I have managed to blow my entire months data allowance in just days on my old phone 200mb was impossible to reach but now I can easily reach and fly right over it thanks to Perez Hilton, Twitter and looking up dogs in funny outfits. Before this bloody contraption I was selective about what I accessed online I didn't have time before to comment on facebook status, reply to tweets or be social on the web (including neglecting writing in this blog) now I have my whole fucking hour commute to stand on my virtual soapbox which means in no time I'll be another Internet fuckwad.

In other non related news since the psychic encounter (two or three entries ago) I've decided to go and see a bunch of cheap psychics a) for kicks b) for research to see if there is any consistency between mediums (cos I is I scientist I is!) and c) cos I live in inner west Sydney and you can't swing a stray cat by it's tail without hitting a hippy psychic so it won't be inconvenient.

I'm a cliche!

I’m at work… I the other day applied for a better job in another department… fingers crossed

 

I probably won’t get but I applied and it will be something to distract me from fact that I ain’t going to be studying for a long time if not ever again, oh well there is always that ukulele course I have been eyeing off at Sydney Community college if I want to be a student again.

 

Le Sigh.

In other non related news I got me an iphone and I’m addicted, it’s simply has ruined me for all future men… wait phones it’s simple and pretty and the internet surfing is a dream I can look at websites quickly, facebook is quicker on my phone than it is on my computer, websites are clear and crisp and don’t get me started on the applications… I may of actually started twittering… I never realised how easy it is to do. Bad me I have become a cliché  I’m an arts student dropout with a blog a facebook and twitter account and now an Iphone.

 

For Shame Kimberly for Shame

 

P.S. the perfect show to upload to an iphone for commutes is ‘Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Good Job’ actually any “Adult Swim” show is great for a commute and I don’t think I can live without my politically incorrect sketch comedy in the morning.

 

 

 

Good Pop Songs From my Childhood: Part One

I've been having all these flashbacks of white ish rap/ hip hop/ dance music one hit wonders from the 90's








c
Lucas with the lid off: I love this clip but then I love Michel Gondry

Scatman John - Scatman
Uploaded by MyUoZiK. - Watch more music videos, in HD!

Snow: Informer; ok it's not that good but damn I used to love this song I used to know all the words too.

STFUmarrieds: link

currently reading STFU marrieds (STFU means shut the fuck up in internets speaks)  it's a collection of bad facebook relationship updates

I spent $20 and all I got was this lousy blog entry

I was changing buses in Sydney’s CBD walking to where I would catch my bus home and listening to my Mp3 player and marvelling at the intricacies of “The Avalanches”  I was a ‘strolling and looking forward to getting home and ploughing into the red wine and takeaway and watching the cable t.v as I was walking a man passing by looked at me strolled past and then backtracked and tapped me on the shoulder, he gestured for me to take my earphones out which I did and then declared “You are a very happy lady! You have two men in love with you and so you are very happy because you will always have two men in love with you!”

I nodded politely (as I only know of one man in love with me and often the number one can be mixed up with the number two) and said thankyou and tried to walk past him, he then tapped me on the shoulder again and declared “I will tell you your fortune, I will tell you everything about your mother and your brother and I will tell you your name and your birth date if I guess these you will stay and if I guess these You will give me some money, and so I thought fuck it why not? If this man can guess my name and my birthday he can get some money so he asked me to write down how much I would give him and I thought I'll be generous because I like street magicians and would write down $20 and then he gave me another piece of paper and a pen and asked me to write down my name and date of birth on a piece of paper and he walked ten metres up the street and wrote what he thought my date of birth was on another piece of paper thinking now that I was about to be mugged or havee my handbag rummaged through I decided at this point to wedge it firmly between my thighs (nobody would ever get tit there) and then he returned to me and made me crush my piece of paper into a ball and chant something to the universe, then he says my name he goes "your name is Kimberly (he mispronounced it as though he has never heard of a Kimberly before) and you were born on the three of the three nineteen eighty-nine" I looked at him and said "aww so close" and then he decided to argue and kept on saying "1989" and saying that was the answer then he opens up his piece of paper he is holding and says '1989" and grabs at my hand and make me show my piece of paper and goes "no wonder! you are messy girl you write messy! you think messy why two men in love with you is mystery!"

I'm standing here it's starting to to get windy it would be 8pm at night and I am straddling my bloody handbag going "what the fuck is going on?" I'm not much of a believer in anything but It was a good show so I went into my handbag to give him the money and leave and then he goes "stop I havent' told you your fortune yet, you'll pay after I tell you everything" so umm ok, and so I stood there freezing on the side of castlereagh st (it's one of the main streets in Sydney's CBD ) whilst a bunch of bemused bystanders waiting for the bus I should've  been waiting for are watching this man read some fat chick with an afro's palms, then he makes me tear up a piece of paper hold it in my hand chant some more and then I open my hand and it's one bloody piece! the bus stop people are now gawking at a free show courtesy of me and I'm trying to catch snippets of what he's saying about money and my mother.

Things apparently in my future;

• I will live to be in my eighties (thanks modern medicine!)

• I will have two children (pretty generic answer there but I suppose if I'm stupid enough to get pregnant once (and decide not to sell it) Ill be stupid enough to get pregnant twice
  
• The two guys in love with me thing; interesting as I barely have one guy in love with me at the moment and that is really dependant entirely on what I cook for dinner. He reveals little else except that my current beau is one of them and the other one doesn't know it (hmm yes I know)
  
• I will become rich successful in my chosen field; apparently I will make people feel better about themselves (I'm thinking I will make my fortune from hiring myself out as the loud, fat, ugly friend who makes the hirer look better by comparison)
• He actually went into detail about my financial woes and actually mentioned several times the main culprit which was a little freaky.
  
• I am apparently obsessed with sex (ok this one isn't much of a secret but he whispered it to me and said "you... you like the sex alot, it's not a bad thing but be careful not alot can keep up with you)

After telling me all of this and then doing some more hand tricks and showing me some laminated cards of his psychic teacher and bits and pieces from his porta-psychic kit he told me I should read the bible every day, I asked him if he meant the 'Christian' bible and he confirmed I should read the 'Christian' Bible I asked him then if he was a Christian, he babbled on and didn't answer my question he then asked if he wanted him to pray for me, and I said something like "If you feel like it go ahead" and then he pulls out another piece of paper and starts writing

"Rich people pay" and he writes $500 on a piece of paper
"normal People pay" and he writes  $300 on the paper
"and poor people pay this" and he writes $200

I start laughing at him, I explain to him that I am beyond poor, I remind him that for the last ten minutes he has mentioned to me how poor I am and that I would not come into money in a very long time, I then tell him that because he is going to take money off me I will be even poorer, he then goes "ok so I can't pray for you then"  and then I said guess not and gave him his money well most of it as I thought I had a $20 note but I only had a $10 and I dumped a wallet full of shrapnel in his portable psychic kitthen he said "but if I pray for you it will come true and you will be forever lucky" I told him sorry and said goodbye

On the way home

• I had to wait 20 inutes in the cold for a bus that is usually every five minutes.
• The bus was held up for another ten minutes halfway through the route as the bus driver had to change buses with another bus driver who was late
• I went to the local supermarket to get some dinner groceries and at the checkout the register had broken mid transaction so they made me wait there for ten minutes... just so they could give me a printed reciept 
• one of the bottles of wine I got on the way home I dropped on the road and no it didn't break, it rolled into the gutter instead
  

things that amuse me

The Spank Bank: Mr Chris Isaak

Oh my frickin' Gawd there is no man alive right now sexier than Mr Chris Isaak! his voice, his hair, the way he dresses, I've been in love since I would of been ten with Chris Isaak and in all honesty I would do pretty much anything to get some pash time with him, I figure once he gets to kiss me because I'm really really good at it he won't want to leave.

I may have watched every episode of his short -lived ( extremely short lives) comedy series The Chris Isaak Show and secretly loved every minute of it, I saw him live about 5 years ago but I haven't been able to afford to go see him since, oh well he'll be back soon (he comes to Australia alot) and I'll be (knickerless and) waiting.

Go watch Wicked Game and if you don't have a man or a lady boner then you are not human.

Mad Me

I'm trying to catch up to Season 3 of Mad Men (currently screening in U.S.A) I love the show ever so much and and have been too busy with a the crap load of other television shows I have waitng to be viewed plus work to prevent me from watching the episodes in the way that I want to watch them... that is in my bed with my hand down my pants a pack of menthol cigarettes in reach, a bottle of cleanskin shiraz on the bedside table and a block of cheese and gluten free crackers and nobody to frickin' interrupt me! so I can watch 13 episodes in a row the way  T.V series in meant to be viewed... right?

But alas in the real world Kimberly (that's me by the way) never can get to watch t.v in the way that she likes so she has to make do with catching up on Mad Men Episodes on her Ipod, on her daily commute, it's not the best way but I do what I have to do to be entertained. But now that there are six episodes of season three stockpiled on my hard drive I decided to spend the last three days dedicated to watching (or rewatcing) every episode from seasons one and two on something larger than a postage stamp, and I did and it was brilliant. and I'm trying now to book some time for my hand/pants/shiraz/cheese/Mad Menathon for my season three episodes.

It has to be soon, it just has to be.

Jumping the gun, as usual

Of course as now that I am totally ageing I went straight to the pharmacy the day I found the grey hair and spent the last of my money on hair dye to make sure that all those grey fuckers were well and truly gone and I think they are (please for the love of Jebus be gone) the downside is I no longer have any more highlights in my hair so now my hair looks like one of those afro wigs you get in a generic pimp costume
Oh it could be worse, I don't know how but I'm sure it could be worse.

Are grey hairs a symptom of an upcoming period? because I  found the hair on Tuesday I think and now it's Friday and I'm totally bleeding... connected right?

Maybe it's payback by my stomach for having gluten, by taking it out on my melanin supply (any doctors reading this blog are so laughing at my lack of brain right now... why would a doctor be reading this crap?)

I had the day off today and bought me some second hand clothing, which made me a happy and from the 70's polyester clothes go swimmingly  with my straight from the 70's polyester looking hair, but more of that will be in the other blog.

I'm looking at the photo comparing us, there is not much difference hairwise, in fact I'm wishing my hair would do the whole ball afro thing at least my hair would look neater and also it would be much easier to dress up as a microphone

Grey skies and hairs ahead.

I was looking in the mirror this morning… as I do most mornings, dwelling on the horrible state my hair is in, it’s no longer short enough to be a cute afro but it’s nowhere near long enough to be cascading ringlets, it’s instead I have this monster of tangles and matting with the occasional blonde remnant from highlights I got last year, anyways I was marvelling at how much my hair had grown since last year using the line left by my highlights and then I saw it a highlighted hair that went all the way to my scalp,  but I haven’t’ had my hair highlighted since November last year, Jiminy cricket what is going on???? I of course panicked and pulled it out straight from the root  and saw it in it’s wiry melanin depleted glory… my first grey, ok it’s not really grey at all it’s actually a beigey colour and I’m hoping and praying that it is a blonde patch (my brother has an unexplained blonde patch)  that I never located due to a lifetime of never being able to see my own scalp a blonde patch of one lone hair but not a grey, it cannot be a grey I cannot go grey at 25 years of age, have you ever seen a hot woman with grey hair (I mean other than Bettina from Play School?) maybe but have you ever seen a hot girl with a salt and pepper afro ? no because grey and frizzy belongs to crazy cat ladies and whilst I hope to become a crazy cat lady (It’s why I moved to be closer to Enmore and have started investing heavily in a ‘vintage’ wardrobe) I was hoping to be hot for the next few years so I can entrap some sucker into knocking me up and ka’ching! child support for the next 20 years! But alas I’m going to have to move fast now before the rest of the buggers move in and I’m ruined! Oh yes there is at home hair dye which is quick and easy to use, but you have never had to dye the regrowth of an afro before and it’s not fun it requires four able bodied people to part the hair and then another two to apply the dye.

 

Sigh.