Stupid digestive tract.

I wish I had money

so I could buy this necklace or

this brooch ( I really am so in love with you why is shipping so expensive)

or this necklace

I spent all my money on Quinoa, Amaranth and coconut flour and other hippy gluten free bullshit, all so I can live a fucking longer and happier life without being a gas bag.

But what's the fucking point if I can't have a toucan brooch.

Life was so much easier when I lived off Mi Goreng and toast and spent the money I had left over on new clothes, ahh those were the days.

Stupid digestive tract.

How do I justify purchasing this ?

- I haven't got a single handbag with telephone detail.

- I desperately NEED something in purple leopard print it's the one thing missing from my life.

- Millionaire men are more likely to marry women with unique plastic handbags